Relationship Counselling can help!

Are you unhappy in your relationship?

Would you like to learn how to treasure each other again?

There are many ways to improve things between you and restore caring, IF you are both committed to the outcome.

I believe in the work of Harville Hendrix and also in the value of agreeing to disagree sometimes, and to work around it.

Forgiveness is a gift to ourselves as well as to our loved ones. Let’s get started — the sooner the better for the health of your marriage or relationship.

How to improve your marriage until you can visit Tammy Laber Marriage Counsellor

Understanding more of the background of your problems (like learning that a father-in-law was a tightwad and that has led to fears around money) may be enlightening. But looking to the past can also take a lot of time. If your marriage is in crisis, a more quick-fix approach could help you stay together long enough to make more lasting change.

Here are a few tips to get you through a crisis:

• Try marriage counselling while you still care about each other. While marriage counselling can be useful at any point, it is the most likely to work when both of you still care. In other words, it is easier for a counsellor to fan the embers back into a loving flame than to start with cold ashes of resentment and bitterness.
• Make time to have fun together. If things have been tough lately, you need to “put some gas in the car” through enjoyable shared activities. What do you both really like to do together? When was the last time you took a hike together, or went out to hear some live music? If those activities aren’t your idea of fun, do whatever you both like.
• Don’t forget to touch, even if everything isn’t perfect between you – hugging and holding hands is a great start to feeling more favourably inclined toward each other. Give a little. You can always retreat later, after you separate – but maybe you won’t need to if you both give a little now!
• Let each other talk. You don’t have to agree with everything your spouse says. If you can help them to feel heard and understood, that goes a long way toward melting resentment.
• Give up trying to score points. You don’t want a fight, just a discussion. And the reason for a discussion is to work toward a solution, not to prove who is right and who is wrong. Ideally you both should feel you have been heard. You are working to find a compromise or a way of handling the issue that is comfortable for both of you.

 

Call me today and let me work with you on all these ideas – and many others! There IS hope, as long as you both want things to be better.