Marriage Counselling in Toronto

Coverage of Registered Psychotherapist Fees

Details: Category: Blog; Created: Sunday, 10 February 2019 16:02; Written by Tammy Laber, Marriage Counselling

Information about Coverage of Registered Psychotherapists Fees(Third-Party Payments)

Registered Psychotherapists are specialized in providing psychotherapy. In 2015 the government of Ontario proclaimed the College of Registered Psychotherapists of Ontario (CRPO) ensuring the competency and qualifications of Registered Psychotherapists.

Psychotherapy services provided by Registered Psychotherapists (RPs) are sometimes excluded from coverage in group benefits plans and private health plans.Some group benefit plans do not cover RP services because no one has asked for inclusion of this benefit.

What you can do to help:

If you work in a unionized setting, ask your union representative to add RPs (Registered Psychotherapists) to the list of professional services included in the group benefits plan during the next contract negotiations.

If you work in a non-unionized setting, ask your employer or human resources department to add RPs (Registered Psychotherapists) to the list of professional services included in the group benefits plan.

If you have a private health plan, ask about adding coverage of RP (Registered Psychotherapy) services to your plan. RP (Registered Psychotherapy) should be a benefit in all private health plans.

For more information:Contact a member of the Registered Psychotherapy Insurance Committee.

Bromance: Global TV asked my opinion

Details: Category: Blog; Created: Monday, 16 October 2017 21:32; Written by Tammy Laber, Marriage Counselling

These days, straight males are not afraid to show affection for close friends, as a recent study of undergrad males in England revealed. Global TV asked me if I thought this would lead to men having less need for women, since they can now have many of their emotional needs satisfied by men.

Actually, Global's original question was whether this would lead to more objectification of women, but I commented that Tinder and online porn have had significant impacts in this area already!

I prefer to think that now there is less homophobia, some men may now be able to have more significant relationships with other men, relationships involving sharing and emotional depth. This would be much more satisfying than having only the activity-based relationships (i.e. golf buddy or drinking buddy) men have traditionally enjoyed.

Perhaps having experienced such relationship depth with another man will help young men learn to open up with women as well. Being able to open up to other people of BOTH genders is a wonderful thing, because humans NEED emotional intimacy in order to thrive. And since the straight men in the study don’t actually want to have sex with another man, they will be much happier when they learn to be emotionally intimate with women as well as men. After all, sex that includes both emotional and physical intimacy is a whole lot better!

Anyway, here's the story. I am only featured in a very short comment near the end.

https://globalnews.ca/video/3804965/study-shows-young-men-prefer-bromance-to-romance

Does the holiday season put a strain on your relationship?

Details: Category: Blog; Created: Thursday, 08 December 2016 22:31; Written by Tammy Laber, Marriage Counselling

Two sets of families – or maybe four – fighting for your attention. Everyone wanting you to be with them at the same time. Long lists of gifts to buy, on top of all your regular purchases. After-work parties with people you barely know. Short days that leave you tired by 6 pm. Stress and frustration. Is that what the holidays are like for you?

It’s no wonder that I see a lot of couples around this time of year who are feeling overwhelmed. They are finding it difficult to please their kids AND their relatives, let alone each other or themselves. Sometimes they are fighting, and many times they seem both anxious and depressed.

It doesn’t have to be this way. If there was ever a time for setting boundaries and putting your nuclear family first, this is it. You can’t always please everyone, but you can cooperate to negotiate compromises and to stand firm as a team on your joint decisions.

Ironically sometimes the first step is to understand where the other side is coming from, and to make sure they know you understand them. You may not be able to give them what they want, but you can at least listen with respect and caring. When people feel heard, they may be more willing to work with you to find a solution.

Maybe there is a way to celebrate together by stretching out visits over more days (who says Boxing Day can’t count?). Or perhaps you can use Facetime or Skype to do a group check-in on days you can’t be there. With a little creativity, you can include people who are far away in the singing of a carol or the opening of gifts. Remember that even things that aren’t perfect can still be good.

A little sadness may be normal, if you are remembering loved ones who are no longer with you. It’s okay to cry, but it’s important to be open to enjoying the here and now as well. Remember that with an open heart, there may be new things to acknowledge with gratitude.

Make time to include others who may be feeling alone. You may find that a new face at the table can deepen your friendship and help others see things in a different light.

Most of all, respect your own boundaries. Think ahead about your budget, your alcohol consumption and your need for sleep. You can’t please everyone, and your health has to come first.

Overall, the holidays are one of the best times of year for cultivating an attitude of gratitude. As far as possible, accept family and friends as they are. Take a walk when you’re feeling stressed and need a few minutes to yourself. Maybe you’ll even see the stars… and feel connected to the greater universe.

All the best for 2017!

Dealing with a spouse who thinks very differently

Details: Category: Blog; Created: Thursday, 03 November 2016 19:20; Written by Tammy Laber, Marriage Counselling

Do you have close friends?

Details: Category: Blog; Created: Wednesday, 02 March 2016 00:47; Written by Tammy Laber, Marriage Counselling

Many men don't have close friends, and as a result, they may not be enjoying the benefits of true friendship, including having a sense that people care about you. I was recently interviewed by Global TV on this topic. In general, people with a least a few close friends are happier and better adjusted.

If you are someone who doesn't have many friends, it's not too late to change that. Make a real effort to get closer to people you know, by taking an interest in what is happening in their lives. When we care about other people, they are more likely to care about us. When you are going to an activity, don't show up at the last minute -- get there a little early and talk with people about your common interest. Don't underestimate the value of a smile, of being friendly, and of making time to go for a coffee or a walk. It takes time to turn an acquaintance into a friend, but it can be done. Be positive, look for opportunities to get to know people better, and eventually some of your encounters with people will "click" and create the start of something more.

Do you love yourself?

Details: Category: Blog; Created: Sunday, 14 February 2016 19:21; Written by Tammy Laber, Marriage Counselling

This Valentine's Day week, I gave some of my clients a special assignment. I asked them to create a handmade Valentine -- for themselves!

It's not as strange as it seems. For people struggling with self-esteem (and that's more of us than you might think), it's a terrific exercise. What do you love and value about yourself? If you were talking to yourself, what would you pat yourself on the back for? What are you proud of? What would you thank yourself for?

When we don't value ourselves, it is a lot harder to give others the love and recognition they deserve. When we constantly criticize ourselves, it is likely we are hard on everyone else as well. Not so much fun. Not truly loving.

Let's try for something more. Let's love the world, one person at a time. Start with yourself.

For those who are in romantic relationships, loving yourself can have a surprisingly good effect on how you get along with your partner. In fact, loving yourself, warts and all, makes it POSSIBLE to really love a partner. That's part of what love is... I know you, really know you, all of you, and I accept and love you just as you are.

Think you might like to treat yourself better? Call me! I can help.

Things to talk about before you marry or move in

Details: Category: Blog; Created: Tuesday, 02 February 2016 15:16; Written by Tammy Laber, Marriage Counselling

Are you on the same page about money, kids, housework and sex? These are some of the things I see couples arguing over. Talking about them before you move in together or marry could save a lot of grief later. Don't just assume you can work it out, because some differences (like whether to have children, and what you will do if you can't) are especially challenging areas in which to create a compromise.

I caution couples that it's not only what you find out through the conversation, it's your style of communicating that matters. Being able to discuss serious topics with respect and having the feeling that both people listened to each other and worked to create agreements -- that's an important part of being ready to making a bigger commitment.

If you need help leaning to communicate well, or if you need help with learning to work things out together, let's talk. I have helped many couples learn to talk in a way that works better, and to work together to create solutions instead of scoring points.

Here is an article from Canadian Living magazine that was just published, where I was interviewed on six conversations to have before you marry.

http://www.canadianliving.com/relationships/love_and_romance/6_crucial_conversations_couples_should_have_before_marriage.php

New Year's Resolutions

Details: Category: Blog; Created: Friday, 01 January 2016 18:16; Written by Tammy Laber, Marriage Counselling

I was interviewed by Susan Hay of Global TV about how to keep New Year's Resolutions. Here are some of the things I recommend.

1) Don't try to change too many things at once. Focussing on one change at a time is more likely to succeed.

2) Break your goal into tiny steps. For example, if your goal is to get into shape, break that down into smaller goals, like "I will exercise three times a week for at least 15 minutes".

3) Make goals achievable. It's better to say "I will lose 10 pounds" and carry it out then to make the goal too big. You want to ACHIEVE goals so you can feel successful.

4) Visualize yourself achieving your goals. If you feel as though your are already succeeding, it gets your subconscious on your side.

5) Reward yourself every time you succeed in the micro goals. For example, after each 15 minutes exercise segment, put a gold star on a paper calendar you post somewhere prominently in your home.

Here is the link from the Global TV interview: