• Marriage Counselling with Tammy Laber

    "Marriages can become challenging, couples can fall out of love. Marriage counselling techniques can help recreate loving feelings."
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    "I’m very comfortable discussing what may be difficult topics for you, such as depression, anxiety and sexuality."
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Bouncing back -- the role of self-care and CBT

Bouncing back when you are down

We’ve all heard the expression, “When life throws you lemons, make lemonade.” Which is good advice, in terms of looking for the opportunity in every setback. But in order to have that attitude of resilience, it helps to be practicing good self-care. It’s a fact – self-care is an important part of your ability to cope with stress, adversity and change.

What is self-care? Your self-care is the sum total of all the things you consciously do to care for your physical, mental, and emotional health.

Here are some ideas for improving your self-care.

Get into nature

Not many of us have a few as lovely as this tree out our window.

But even taking a few minutes to stand beside a large old tree and really notice the branches, the leaves (if it’s not winter), the bark, the majestic beauty and endurance, can be inspiring. Many problems have come and gone while this tree stood, and it endures. So can you.

Take tough times moment by moment

Don’t think about enduring pain forever. Think about getting through this day. If necessary, concentrate on getting through this hour.

At least a little exercise every day

It may be just a walk around the block. But do something. Exercise clears the head wonderfully. Try to do at least a little exercise every day – frequency matters even more than duration. If you can find it in you to work out hard and get the blood going, that’s even better – it will help release endorphins, feel-good chemicals you really need right now.

Call a friend or family member – and ask about THEM.

It’s easy to get caught up in your own problems and forget to keep things in perspective. A good talk with someone you care about can help you remember what you like about your life, and give you the benefit of remembering others are also coping with problems. They say that most of us, if we had to choose from our problems or those of someone else, would take our own problems back.

There is a statue called Empathy on display in the Toledo Botanical Garden.  It symbolizes the beauty of engaging with others and the positive feelings it can create.

CBT may help

Remember, it’s not the hard times that shape you, it’s how you respond. We cannot choose exactly what happens to us. But we do get a say in how we deal with it. You have more control over your moods than you may realize, because you have the power to shift how you think about things. This is one of the basic ideas behind CBT, or Cognitive Behavioural Therapy. To learn more about CBT and how it could help you, call me at 416 406-5147 or set up an appointment by emailing me at This email address is being protected from spambots. You need JavaScript enabled to view it..

Tammy Laber Contact

Marriage Counselling Toronto

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