Empathy matters
Imagine taking a selfie in front of a car accident. Or a selfie in front of a building on fire. What about a selfie at a funeral – or at Auschwitz?
As I recently told Global News, we are witnessing a decline in empathy and an increase in narcissism. Some people raised on video games and violent “humour” are forgetting that when life hands them this type of situation, the right thing to do is to try to help if they possibly can. In an emergency situation, maybe you can do something, even if that is just by dialing 911 and making sure the police are on the way to the accident or fire, if you don't see emergency response people there already. Or at least show respect for the feelings of others. Gawking and taking selfies – not so much.
Global was motivated to interview me by a story where seven women took selfies at the site of a New York building explosion, while rescuers were still searching for missing people in the ruins.
http://globalnews.ca/video/1912676/new-york-selfie-backlash
Selfies not taken at the site of a tragedy can be harmless, the equivalent of travel pictures showing you were there. But when we take selfies every moment of the day, we are being self-absorbed. We are playing for “our public”, our Facebook friends, the people who we want to admire us. And we are not living in the moment and fully experiencing life as it happens.
I’ve seen the same phenomenon on a trip with a newbie traveller. He took hundreds of pictures a day, so many that it was annoying to be with him. So he wasn’t really present, enjoying the sunset. He was just taking picture 451 for the day.
I am disturbed when I see two or more people spend an entire dinner in a restaurant on their cell phones, instead of attempting to make conversation with each other. I don’t mean quickly checking for messages. I mean texting and taking photos all through the meal, so that they aren’t really present with each other.
I worry about what happens to people who exist in an electronic bubble all day long. Will anyone take first aid courses in the future? What kind of world is this if the person bleeding over there is just entertainment, not a suffering human? To be less dramatic, how much harder is it to make contact with other humans if no one stops to talk or smile on the street or in an elevator, because they are staring at their electronic devices?
Human connection, including smiles and touch, is so important to our emotional wellbeing. When you're staring at the phone all the time, real face-to-face connection doesn't have a chance to happen.
My suggestion? Put down the phone and the cameras, and really connect with each other. Practice empathy and compassion -- they are good for the soul. When you’re really present and enjoying the moment with everything you’ve got, you’re creating a vivid memory, the kind you don’t need a selfie to remember.
In case you're interested, here's a link to the main interview I did on Global:
http://globalnews.ca/video/1912490/selfies-in-inappropriate-places-littering-the-internet
